[To the tune of “Lady Madonna” by Paul McCartney and John Lennon]

Silly little Starstrung

Crazy little Star

How the hell’d she manage to make it so far?

Such an impish critter

Such a foolish Puck

Did you think I made it here by sheer dumb luck?

You kept me because I was unthreatening

“There’s no way a thing like that could beat us”

You thought I was nothing but a goofling

*pulls up her family’s file and reveals that her recorded IQ of 73 is actually 173*

But I’m a suuuupergeeenius!

You were duped by Starstrung

All hands played their part

I’ve been in control of this game from the start!

You spent all your votes ‘cause you were reckless

I made sure the Gate Troll shut you down.

And don’t think I don’t know about your necklace:

*draws the necklace out of a satchel, grinning*

Whooooo has it now?!

Silly little Starstrung

And that’s the final spin

No one saw it coming but now I’m gonna win!

Finally there’s no more need for secrets

It’s so good to finally drop my shell

Oh, there’s no more incantations in your spellbook

Go on… cast a spell!

Now you know the story

What do you think?

You’ve all been outwitted by a cute little mink!