500 Miles by Bicycle

Thorin N. Tatge

(To “Five Hundred Miles” by Hedy West and “500 Miles” by the Proclaimers)

Got no clue what road I’m on

I’ve been pedaling since dawn

And by now I must have gone a hundred miles

A hundred miles, a hundred miles, a hundred miles, a hundred miles,

Since this morning I have gone a hundred miles.

Shirt stuck fast to my back

Not a penny in my pack

Lord, I can’t go on for long this-a-way

This-a-way, this-a-way, this-a-way, this-a-way

Lord, I can’t go on for long this-a-way.

Lord, I’m one, Lord, I’m two, Lord, I’m three, Lord, I’m four

Lord, I’m five hundred miles from my home

Five hundred miles, five hundred miles, five hundred miles, five hundred miles

Lord, I’m five hundred miles away from home.

(To Proclaimers tune)

And I will walk five hundred yards and I will walk five hundred more

Just to be the one to hitch one thousand miles in someone else’s car.

Sha-la-la-la! Sha-la-la-la! La la la la la la la la!

When I speed up

I know where I want to go, I want to go until it’s time for me to stop.

And when I slow down

I know where I want to be, I want to be in some exotic cream shop.

(To first tune)

Riding up the endless hill

Takes great patience and great skill.

And I haven’t reached its crest, and never will.

Five hundred miles, six thousand miles, nine million miles, ten zillion miles

I’ll be riding on my bike five hundred miles.